Find Your Flow

What Do I Mean By Flow?

True story, I nearly called Your Wellbeing Directory, Flow Finder. Until too many people told me it sounded like a period tracker app. The idea of ‘flow’ is so central to my thinking in many ways; to me it means being in tune and in line with the way we need our life to be. It describes the way we can work and live when we have that personal blend JUST RIGHT for us. (I could have called YWD, ‘Just Right’ too, but that’s a breakfast cereal). It’s when the circumstances and environment both outside and inside us are in that place of serendipity to allow us to focus, to get going, and to enjoy what we’re doing. In terms of our wellbeing and our ability to be productive in our work lives – which together equal our capacity to find contentment and happiness – it’s such a personal and unique thing to each of us.

We can probably tune in right now to knowing times and tasks that help us feel in that flow state and equally, we can probably easily describe situations and types of work that definitely don’t elicit a flow state from us. I know that I’m likely to feel in my flow when working with clients, or doing creative tasks, especially when it’s mid to late afternoon, when I’m alone at home, when it’s quiet. I also know that to get myself into the right mood I need to have no niggling hangover-tasks like people waiting for a response on email or those admin tasks that linger a bit too long on the to-do list. I know that I might need to listen to the radio or a podcast to help me get started but that once I’m hooked into the flow then they’ll be turned off and I need silence. I know that I’m unlikely to be able to do my best thinking first thing in the day or in the evening. I’m a fussy sort, aren’t I? The secret is we all are…

Our need to find flow in life drives us to match up the way we need to be, with the routines and lifestyles we need. To feel right and to find that balance we need to know the right things we need to support us in terms of our physical, spiritual, emotional, and mental health and again that’s so personal and unique to each of us. Perhaps spend a moment here thinking about those 4 categories and for each one, identify what nourishes you and what depletes you – I usually think of these in terms of Fountains and Drains.

Work With Your Energy States

I’ve learned that, with a Busy Brain, getting into flow depends on setting the right scene. It helps to find the best time of day and kick things off with a “sensory bridge,” like a podcast or some tunes to get me started—then switching to silence once I’m hooked. Sometimes, a quick dopamine boost, like energising myself with some badass tunes, is the trick to diving in. Re-creating the sensations and environment of past productive moments can make all the difference – when you get the feeling right the energy flows!

When a task feels impossible, it’s time to call in “Body Doubling.” Before I even knew about ADHD, I’d rope in my husband to stand by the door so I’d actually leave the house on time! Body Doubling doesn’t mean someone needs to help; they just need to be there, acting as gentle accountability. Some people even find that a pet or working in a café has the same effect. Co-working spaces are also a great option for this.

Other strategies like the Pomodoro technique (working in bursts with breaks) or breaking a task down to its smallest part can also help. For me, these work best as a gentle nudge, hoping I’ll get ‘hooked’ and keep going!

Busy Brains may crave novelty, but we also need structure, even if we fight it! We might resist, stumble, and need lots of outside support, but routines give us a reliable blueprint to lean on. And when we inevitably go off-course, forgiveness and self-compassion are essential tools for getting back on track.

Defining Your Personal Flow – Your Unique Gifts

Think about your qualities that come most easily and bring the most enjoyment – which parts of yourself do you feel most proud of and are complimented on the most… this is where to bask in the feelgood appreciation of what a brilliant person you are. You could definitely tell me right now what these qualities are. This is your personal flow, it’s your gift to the world. I’m deliberately going to avoid the word ‘superpower’ here because it’s become a bit too loaded in the world of neurodivergence, but we’ve all got them.

The flip side is the stuff that is not what you were put on the earth to do, it’s the stuff that we still have to make happen in life, but it feels like wading through treacle to do. Too often we beat ourselves up because we judge ourselves by how bad we are at some things. You know what I’m talking about, the places in life where we’re never going to get it right. You could tell me right now what your shortcomings are, but do you know what? It doesn’t matter, because we all have those things and if you were entering the Life Olympics then that isn’t the event you’d put yourself forward for! I would never in a million years choose to judge myself on my ability to fold and put away laundry because I’m just never, ever, going to get to grips with that and who cares. There’s other stuff I’m amazing at and I’d rather focus my energies on shining a light in their direction. ‘Only Just Good Enough’ is the standard I’ll apply to the things that aren’t for me or I’ll outsource them.

Flow isn’t about doing everything perfectly or having endless motivation on tap. It’s about finding that sweet spot where you can shine, tapping into what feels most natural and satisfying for you. Embrace what fuels you, forgive what drains you, and shape your days around your own rhythm, quirks, and strengths. Because, at the end of the day, flow is personal, and so is success.

Find your flow, lean into it, and let it be your guide – and remember, it’s not about being flawless; it’s about being MORE YOU.

Love, Jill x x x

If you’re on a journey of exploring what it means to lean into being MORE YOU then you might like to hear more about our Busy Brains Club, you can email me at [email protected].